How Do You Strengthen Family Dynamics?
Family dynamics are at the core of family interactions. Family dynamics represent how a family shows up when they are together. They can undermine intentions, agreements, derail conversations. They can support, lift up and grow the heart of the family. The problem is when a family doesn’t know its “brand”, what it stands for, what its purpose or mission is, then individual agendas vie for supremacy. Family dynamics can both foster and cut the family’s heart. Which do you want to nurture? Many families struggle with effective communication around sensitive topics. Do they wait for the ticking time bomb to go off? Do they pass it on to another generation to deal with? Do they remain silent on the subject? Is there a process to talk about subjects with respect and without tension?
When family members know the purpose for the family, who they represent, what they want their future generations to know and to carry forward as ambassadors to the family “seal”, a code is established from which families can talk about the sensitive topics they have to resolve, whether it is a family piece of art, a family vacation home, a business or other important subjects of future relevance and significance to the family. Success means determining the purpose of the conversation, the intention of those engaged in the conversation about the “asset” in conversation, and the intentions of each for that “asset.”
I work with families by guiding conversations through tough family decisions. These conversations start with an agreed purpose, intention, and outcome. As facilitator to these conversations, I help guide the conversations to their resolution. I ensure all voices are heard. I keep the conversation on topic and moving forward. As observer my role is to understand what is going on, finding agreement, looking to building bridges between dissenting points of view, keeping emotional charges from being lit, and instead, looking to build bridges of accommodation and respectful resolution. When a family is willing to have a neutral party come in, who is not looking to take over, but is there to guide them to what is best for their family with all voices being heard, considered, and understood, decisions can be made to benefit the family, as a whole.
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